Mayor & Mayoress Barred from Gosport Pubs

Doesn’t matter who you are, if you misbehave in pubs, you will get barred. Even if you have status, officialdom, and a big chain around your chest!

You couldn’t make this up but it is true! A town’s newly elected Mayor and Mayoress have been banned from 36 pubs in their own town, this despite their using that well worn phrase “do you know who I am?”.

Well 36 pubs in a Hampshire town, who have collectively barred the couple for 6 months, took no heed of this subliminal threat and duly told them they are not welcome, well not until they behave themselves and do not appear to be drunk and disorderly, which caused their eviction in the first place!

The “self important” couple have 6 months to reflect and to swot up on the Licensing Act (which they are responsible in some way for enforcing) thereby ensuring their town’s pubs sell alcohol in a responsible way!

Gosport Pubwatch confirmed that the couple have been barred from their 36-pub membership, having been asked to leave one of their member pubs. “Quite rightly so” said the J D Wetherspoon HO spokesperson who supported the local JDW manager who took the original decision to tell them to leave his premises. Pubwatch chairman Phil Cox said, “we didn’t treat them any differently to how we treat anyone else, it doesn’t matter who you are, we want our pubs to be more comfortable, and pleasant places to be in with no abuse towards any member of staff. They should know better!”. Absolutely, so say all of us!

Not possible to know if the two worthies are embarrassed or going to take their case to the Court of Human Rights (like some other thug recently barred from the towns pubs in a Cornish resort) because (perhaps unsurprisingly) neither are available for comment. Plus, the Mayor of Gosport website is currently offline. Wonder why?


Martin Read CMBII
Managing Director of www.inn-dispensable.com Personal Licence Courses

A Half Pint Glass Which Looks Like A Full Pint?!

Apparently there are fellas (might also be some gals) out there who cannot drink "pints" any more (or at least cannot keep up with their mates who still can!). They however believe that to maintain their reputation that they are not gibbers but real "drinking sorts", drinking "halves" is not an option (well not openly and proudly).

So there is now a new glass on the market that is a pint size in height but it is cut down the middle so that it only holds a half pint. But, if you hold it correctly, with the "front round side" facing your mates, it looks like a full pint (are you still with me?).

Not sure what happens when your mates ask "what you are having?". Do you say "pint please" - to keep up the illusion that you are still one of the lads (or lasses). If so, then presumably the bar staff on being presented with said glass, are either in on the act or they spill the other half a pint on the floor.

This idea could also work well for slimmers. "Full English please" - then cut the sausages in half, along their length? Topside up would still look like a full plate of food!

I wish the manufacturers well, but hope they haven’t produced too many! Happy days.


Martin Read CMBII
Managing Director of Inn-Dispensable Personal Licence Courses

Gazza To Open A Pub Chain?

That goal he scored all of those years ago, with an overhead flick and a sensational finish and then a celebration mimicking guzzling alcohol was sensational. “The Dentists Chair” gained a whole new meaning! Though I’m not so sure it’s such a sensational an idea for Gazza to now think of getting into the Pub business!

Apparently Mr Gascgoigne wants to franchise his “Gazza” protected name and open a number of bars called “GAZZA BARS” with franchisees running them, he presumably would turn up on occasions to help build the brand!

I have utmost sympathy for those who really cannot handle alcohol and considering that our man has recently spent 12 weeks in rehab in Arizona where he was under a strict alcohol ban, spending time in bars now, would seem to be a risky hobby?

Stay out of the pub business Paul, we want to see you recover permanently, it ain’t for you anymore. Drink fruit juice, go find another venture to promote your name and fame.


Martin Read CMBII
Managing Director of Inn-dispensable Personal Licence Courses

The Landlord's Human Right To Bar Anti-social Behavior

There is a fundamental principle for licencees that they can “refuse service” to anyone they like, as long as their refusal is not on the grounds of Race, Gender or Disability. In effect when you go into a pub you go into the Landlords “house”, and after all each of us has a right to refuse entry to anyone we do not want come into our own homes!

I well remember a dirty, smelly, old tramp coming into our pub many years ago, and we had no hesitation in telling him he was not welcome. We did give him a wrapped sandwich and a bottle of pop to send him on his way though! I also remember a guy, well known in our town, who after three pints would want to take the world on - he wasn’t welcome either!

A Landlord also has a right to “ban” a person from his pub, and often, if that Landlord belongs to a local “Pubwatch” organisation, the same person will (or might) be banned from all pubs within their territory, this without seeking recourse to the law.

Well now; such a banned person (a 24 year old male banned for some 6 months from pubs within a Cornish town) is seeking redress from The European Court of Human Rights because he believes that the local Pubwatch organisation have banned him without him having had a chance to defend himself in a court of law. The local Pubwatch spokesperson said “What about the human rights of other people to enjoy their drink in a pub or the rights of publicans to run their business?”

I have no knowledge whatsoever of why this fellow has been banned, I do know however that Landlords and Pubwatch organisations do not ban people lightly, why would they when they need all of the customers they can get? Surely publicans must have the right to decide who can and who cant be in their pubs, it is very easy for the libertarians to sit at home and make judgements but you try serving and welcoming for example; some thug determined to make everyone’s life a misery, fuelled with god knows what inside him on a Saturday night when your locals are trying to have a quiet pint!

The customers of a pub are the reflection of the Landlord, of his standards and his hospitality; let us hope this fellow is not successful in claiming that his human rights have been infringed! Perhaps he might reflect on the reasons why he was banned in the first place?

Martin Read CMBII
Managing Director of www.inn-dispensable.com Personal Licence Courses

SIBA 2014 Champion Ale Brewer

Many congratulations to Joe Holiday, brewer at North Cotswold Brewery, near Moreton in Marsh who has won the prestigious title of Overall Champion Ale for his Hung Drawn ‘n’ Portered Ale at the recent SIBA (Society Independent Brewers) Wales and West competition.

Inn-Dispensable is proud to be a supporter of NCB and indeed once had the pleasure of counting the MD Guy Holiday as a tutor of our courses, this before he started his brewery business. Guy remains a keen colleague of Inn-Dispensable and we wish him and his team continued success

Should you ever wish to tour the brewery look up their details on www.northcotswoldbrewery.co.uk

Martin Read CMBII
Managing Director of www.inn-dispensable.com Personal Licence Courses

Law On 'Acting' Drunk Confuses UK Police

You couldn’t make it up!

The Licensing Act of 2003 has many fine regulations including those to ensure that alcohol is sold Responsibly. One of the regulations is aimed to stop "drunken persons" from being served alcohol. The onus falls upon the person serving the alcohol to not do so, but unfortunately there is no definition of 'drunk'. This means that bar staff have to use some common sense (*blimey*) and subjective judgment.

The giveaway signs of 'drunkenness' will likely be a customer’s unsteadiness on their feet, glazed eyes, slurred speech and boozy breath. It is the bar person selling the alcohol who will be the one that could be prosecuted, so they need to be satisfied that the person isn’t drunk. On conviction, they could face a fine of up to £1000!

Interestingly there is no offence for a person who is blind drunk to attempt to buy alcohol, it is an offence however to purchase alcohol for someone who appears to be drunk (so watch out when it is your round) and even more interestingly if the police use "actors" to pretend to be drunk, there is no offence for serving alcohol to a person who is acting as if they are drunk, so all of that time spent by actors at RADA is wasted! Not too sure if it is an offence to buy alcohol for an actor who is acting as if he/she is drunk (will have to await a first case).

A number of police forces have recently employed actors to carry out some test purchases doing just that (pretending to be drunk). No prosecution could be brought to bear because as stated; serving a person pretending to be drunk is not unlawful.

Happy days.


Martin Read CMBII
Managing Director of www.inn-dispensable.com Personal Licence Courses

Two Sides To Every Story! Hilarious

A bit of a spat has broken out between a young (brilliant) entrepreneur; James Watt, who along with his partner Martin Dickie co-founded BrewDog, a craft brewer based in Edinburgh and The Portman Group - a mighty and worthy organisation who spend their time ensuring alcohol is marketed responsibly in the UK.

The role of the Portman Group is to:

• Lead on best practice in alcohol social responsibility through the actions of member companies.
• Regulate the promotion and packaging of alcoholic drinks sold or marketed in the UK through our Code of Practice.
• Challenge and encourage the industry to market its products responsibly.

The group is a not-for-profit organisation funded by nine member companies who represent every sector of drinks production and collectively account for more than half the UK alcohol market.

However, young James, (a Law and Economics graduate before changing careers and becoming a brewery owner) issued a somewhat unusual and perhaps irreverent (some would say hilarious, but I couldn’t possible comment) response as follows;
"On behalf of BrewDog PLC and its 14,691 individual shareholders, I would like to issue a formal apology to the Portman Group for not giving a shit about today’s ruling. Indeed, we are sorry for never giving a shit about anything the Portman Group has to say, and treating all of its statements with callous indifference and nonchalance.

Unfortunately, the Portman Group is a gloomy gaggle of killjoy jobs-worths, funded by navel-gazing international drinks giants. Their raison d’être is to provide a diversion for the true evils of this industry, perpetrated by the gigantic faceless brands that pay their wages. Blinkered by this soulless mission, they treat beer drinkers like brain-dead zombies and vilify creativity and competition. Therefore, we have never given a second thought to any of the grubby newspeak they disseminate periodically.

While the Portman Group lives out its days deliberating whether a joke on a bottle of beer is responsible or irresponsible use of humour, at BrewDog we will just get on with brewing awesome beer and treating our customers like adults. I’m sure that makes Henry Ashworth cry a salty tear into his shatterproof tankard of Directors as he tries to enforce his futile and toothless little marketing code, but we couldn’t give a shit about that, either.

The Portman Group took objection to the phrase "rip it up down empty streets"? Mr Portman, you seem to like taking things literally. Can you please explain how something can be 'anti-social' if the streets are empty? Anti-social is defined as 'contrary to the laws and customs of society, in a way that causes annoyance and disapproval in others.' If the streets are empty, there are no 'others' to annoy".

I haven’t as yet seen any response from the Portman Group! Great Eh? Whose side are you on?


Martin Read CMBII
Managing Director of www.inn-dispensable.com Personal Licence Courses